Why You Shouldn't Drink a Pint of Cocktail through a Funnel!

You may think by the title that this needs little orvision started to disappear in the EXACT same
no explaining, but after my recent experience Ifashion as the end scene of Terminator 2. First it
feel it my duty to warn you should a similarnarrowed in the horizontal plane, then the vertical,
situation present itself to you.It starts off athen disappeared with a 'pop'.That's where my
normal night drinking, nothing out of the ordinary.memories end. You may think I passed out and
Drinking, laughing, music, you know the norm.while I wish that were true it wasn't. My body
Then out the corner of your eye you seecarried on while my mind had shut down.It starts
someone sporting a shiny plastic golden medalwith people trying to get me into bed after they
with the words 'winner' branded on the front. Ifound me to be uttering complete jibberish and
eye up the shiny medal, feeling slightly jealous as Imaking no sense whatsoever. After numerous
don't have one. More drinking ensues. Thenattempts to get me to stay there I finally settle
another person is sporting a medal just like thedown only to warble away at the top of my
first. Now I REALLY want a medal! I ask thevoice in the fashion of an enormous
bearer of the medal where he got it from, aMogwai.Embarrasing enough you might think, but
cryptic message follows "you haven't earned aoh no, it gets better. For some reason, in the
medal". Now I don't REALLY want a medal, Imiddle of the night, I must have thought it was a
YEARN for a medal. I beg the bearer to allow megood idea to come downstairs where a few of
to earn a medal, he leads me to a room wherethe more sober guests still remained IN ONLY MY
there is a chair in the middle of the room.I amBOXER SHORTS! A sight and a half at best, I'm
placed upon the chair and a cocktail is mixednot the smallest person and the sight of my
before my eyes, multiple shots of Jack Daniels,naked belly is enough to stop darts in mid air! I
rum, countless other spirits, and beer are mixedthen proceded to make myself comfortable next
together to fill exactly 1 pint glass. A funnel is thento the host and repeatedly punch him in the leg, all
thrust into my mouth and the contents of theI can say is it must have made sense at the time.
pint glass poured into the funnel. GOD IT BURNS! IAfter the assault I took myself off to bed and
brave the burning sensation and drink the cocktailslept like a baby only to have my antics retold to
as fast as possible among the chants from theme in the morning amongst a HUGE headache,
surrounding people. Within a few seconds of thewhich could only be topped off by the fact that it
lethal cocktail being poured in to the funnel it waswas revealed to me I was caught on a
gone and the medal was now mine! For a while Icamcorder throughout the whole ordeal!
sat content knowing that I had earned the prizeGREAT!Well let that be a lesson to one and all, if
of prizes, a plastic shiny medal sporting the wordyou see someone sporting a shiny plastic 'winner'
'winner'.The feeling of content and pride didn't lastmedal, try to ignore it because it'll end in tears!
long til it was replaced with the words 'oh god'.My